To the Girl Who Loved Him First

Dear You, the girl who loved him first before God ever placed him in my life:

I do not know you very well. In fact I don’t even know your last name, or your favorite color, or even what your favorite thing about him was. I do not know what or how you envisioned your life, your future but I am sure that you never imagined it without him. What I do know, from what I am told, is that you were giving, patient, loving and kind. I do know that for years you loved him as much as I love him today. I do know that a part of you may hate me or maybe a part of you blames me for what happened. But if that is the case, I pray to God that you forgive me for whatever transgressions you may believe I have committed agaisnt you. But I will tell you this: I never saw this coming.

It may be weird or awkward and some may not understand why I am writing this but a part of me feels like this is right. I would like to say to you: thank you. Thank you for loving him at his rawest moments. For loving him when he was lost and still finding his way.For giving what you had with an open and honest heart. You made him think, you inspired him, you allowed God to use you to plant seeds in his life and I am sure you envisioned your future with him and never saw him leaving. But I know that God works in ways we do not understand. I truly believe his appreciation for you has grown now that the two of you are not together and I tell you this- I encourage him to explore and process those emotions. I encourage him to remember the good in you and the blessing that you were for that season. Even though that season is gone and God has shaped him into the man for me, know that your work and time together was not in vain.

I pray and know with all my heart that God has a man for you somewhere out there still waiting for you. I know that that man will love you the way you wished and prayed he would have loved you.But know that you played a part of the man he is today and that you were never used. You were appreciated and loved to his best ability at that time and today, I see the man he has become. A man who loves and appreciates me but I am thankful that God chose you to be the woman to teach him, grow with him and love him until it was time for us to meet. Again, I don’t think me writing this would make sense to anyone. Honestly, it doesn’t even make sense to me but I am always obedient with my desire to write.

Today, I love him more than I have loved anyone. I know that God has placed us together and that our future has always been in God’s plans for our lives but I also know that your season with him was just as important and I recognize that. So I end with this: I pray your heart is healing, I pray you are happy and walking in purpose and know that your season with him was not in vain. You are beautiful and worthy of a love that God is still crafting for you. I pray that one day you no longer see him as the man who broke your heart but as the man who was obedient to God by leaving and giving back that space in your life for the man who is supposed to love and honor in the purist and Godliest of way.

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