Not About What You Say or Do But How You Said or Did It.

As believers many of us get to a place where we are so on fire for Christ that we want to fix everything we deemed ‘unholy’ or ‘wrong.’ We hear someone cursing and feel a stinging feeling in our stomach. We see a woman dressed provocatively and we judge and probably say things like, “put some clothes on” “you must not have respect for yourself if you chose to dress like that” “whose attention are you trying to get anyway” and better yet my favorite one (sarcasm) “you know they say the way you dress is how you want to be addressed.” Its as though we have spent all of our lives being this perfect and holy Christian and never made a mistake or cursed or dressed in way that was not pleasing to God. We speak to people whether non believer or new believers as though God didn’t work in our lives and pull us out of our mess just as He is doing for all of His children; newborn believer or not. Yes, I believe that wholeheartedly our intentions may be good as all we want is people to be ‘holy’ and look, talk, and even dress like their Christians. But what does that even mean.

We somehow develop this model of how and what is Christian is and anyone who does not fit that mold by our standards is therefore not Christian enough. When honestly are any of us? Is there anything we do that is enough for God or is it His grace, mercy, love, and Holy Spirit that is perfect in us and thus does good works in us, through us. As believers, Jesus lovers I like to say, our job is to be the light of the world through Jesus’s greatest commandment: LOVE. You cannot help your fellow brother or sister out of their darkness or wrong doing by chastising them, judging them, speaking to them in a condescending tone or having an attitude. Jesus didn’t do that to you, did He? Instead love and be an example because as believers you are being watched by everyone: believers and non-believers.

We have all heard “It’s not abut what you say, its about how you say it,” and honestly that is so true. You ever have someone say, “Don’t you look nice today,” but the way they said or the tone and attitude they had about it rubbed you the wrong way and you probably took offense to it. It is just like that when you are trying to be the light to someone else. And remember majority of communication is non verbal. When you hear someone cursing, instead of being angry, judging them and having negative thoughts towards that person, pray for them. Say a prayer to God and ask Him to change that person into His liking but that’s not it. As a believer you need to set that example by not cursing and speaking life taking words yourself! You cannot be the pot calling the kettle black.

“Let He who is without sin cast the first stone -John8:7”

Jesus said that! Not me. Casting the first stone to someone is lost and still trying to find their way in Christ is judging them, gossiping about them, being rude and any words or action that is not of love. It is not your job to change anyone. You are not God and you cannot change people. Our job is to plant seeds and be an example. So if you see your sister in Christ dressing n a provocative manner first of all make sure you aren’t dressing as the world either, pray for her, and maybe one day take her shopping and offer to buy her a nice blouse or outfit that you both find fitting for her. It is these actions that will show love and rub off in a good way. But in doing this, make sure your heart is in the right place. Do not do it with an attitude or spirit of “oh, this girl needs serious help, walking around here dressed like a heathen” or “let me help her cause she needs it and Lord knows I got this part of being a Christian down packed.” You see what I am saying and where I am going with this?

So I urge you to first, pray agaisnt and discard all those negative thought, attitudes, and feeling because you will never help anyone come to Christ with such things. It is love that drive out hate, fear, doubt, and judgment. It is love that God has given us as weapons against the darkness and evil of this world. You are not perfect no matter how many years you feel like you have put into the kingdom of God and neither is your brothers or sisters. So love, pray, treat and speak to them the way you would want to be; the way Christ would love, pray, treat and speak to them

XOXOXO,

Lise

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